Phil,

I still think you're a great laugh, but since I really
do think you are suffering with the autism - I can tell
it's reducing your quality of life - I'd like to pass on
something I once saw in a TV programme about some people
with the condition.

One American academic woman found that she would avoid contact
with people at times, and felt rage and frustration building
up inside her. She found, I think partly by accident and
from childhood memories, that if she put herself in a
kind of cage contraption - like those used for cows when they're
being milked, then her animal rage would be calmed.

She uses the technique regularly to get rid of the inner
anguish and calm herself down.

Maybe you could try something similar.

On the other hand, I guess it's sometimes useful to
count matches people have dropped in under a second.

Most of all, though, and I do think you need to come to
terms with this : Autism is nothing to be ashamed of.


Martin